so here's the deal, I work in a family business doing extremely complex and detailed construction. we specialize in countertop repair. I have been taking on an increasing amount of responsibility lately and business is up by about 20% as compared to the last 5 years... things are good. the problem is that sometimes it is necessary for me to work later on jobs then planned to finish up and this can make me late to rehearsal with my band. in the last 2 weeks work related delays have resulted in me being late to 2 rehearsals and cancelling 2. I am at an impass because things are out of my control. I need to finish at a customers. but I want more than anything to be reliable when it comes to music. WTF should I do?
it should also be said I have been doing this work for years and have been playing with these guys in various iterations for almost as long, so its not a new situation . but it is causing me a ton of stress.
works gotta come first. hopefully the dudes understand.
Be thankful you have a good job and do what ever you have to do to keep it. This economy sucks!
Most bandmates I jam with are pretty understanding about stuff like that. We all have jobs that work us for long hours and sometimes cause us to miss and be late to rehearsals. I've been slammed lately and working late often and our drummer has been in the same boat lately. We just jockeyed our rehearsal schedule around to accommodate our work hours. Luckily the rest of the band have been understanding of our plight and were accommodating. I'm betting if these guys have been cool enough to jam with for years. They'll be cool enough to understand your dilemma.
The best music comes from when everything sucks. If music doesn't pay its a hobby, and hobbies have to fit with what you do to keep fed. And if it does pay, you are probably in a covers band, and fuck them.
Explain to them very candidly and honestly exactly how you laid it out for us. They should be able to understand becasue you're being very reasonable and apologetic.
Another thing might to schedule rehearsals later than your band's normal time, if possible. That way you'll have more of a buffer in case you're stuck working late.
Work first, James. Work first.
Work has been kicking my butt this year. I went from teaching classes I've taught a million times to stepping up and taking over the AP Biology program and it's just so much more work. For the last few weeks it's been nearly all 12 hour days at work and then a few more hours of prep once I get home. I never have time to write songs. We've got this great new drummer and I feel guilty and obligated to ask him to practice once in awhile to let him know that I'm still interested but I just don't have new material. Fortunately after the kids take the AP test next week we're essentially done so I'll have next to no prep work to do after school or at home. I've had it pretty good the last few years where I just relied on experience and the years of materials and resources I had stockpiled but this is all new and it moves at such a fast pace. What makes me worried is that I don't want to push music further and further back because that's how it starts to slip away and you turn into one of those "I used to be in a band" kinda guys or a "I'm looking to start a new project in the near future" that never turns out sorta guys.
Quote from: Jake on May 09, 2012, 05:17:21 PM
Explain to them very candidly and honestly exactly how you laid it out for us. They should be able to understand becasue you're being very reasonable and apologetic.
Another thing might to schedule rehearsals later than your band's normal time, if possible. That way you'll have more of a buffer in case you're stuck working late.
Think that's pretty much what I would say too. Family and work (ie food and shelter for your family) come first but we all need to make music.
Hey James- what's "me being late to 2 rehearsals". When we were in a band together you were late every rehearsal.
If you are going to be late sometimes, don't be the guy that holds the keys to the space.
Quote from: franksnbeans on May 09, 2012, 06:37:36 PM
Hey James- what's "me being late to 2 rehearsals". When we were in a band together you were late every rehearsal.
not to argue, but that isn't 100% accurate and i believe i specified "in the last 2 weeks"
now obviously by bringing this up i amm well aware that I have a history of being late on occasion, but there are plenty of times when I'm there hours early and/ or on time. I also realize that the only important thing is to be on time. early is cool, but it doesn't make up for late. I am totally aware that the burden is on me to be on the ball.
foxen, we all have keys
What about making your day off the main rehearsal day. Start the other (workday) rehearsal days later (as Jake said) and the dudes should be able to practice/write without you, even if you are late.
situations temporary..you do what you got to do. the work will slow down..that shit always ebbs and flows.
Being a grown up can suck sometimes.
the only thing good about it is that you can get beer easily.
Quote from: franksnbeans on May 09, 2012, 06:37:36 PM
Hey James- what's "me being late to 2 rehearsals". When we were in a band together you were late every rehearsal.
That seems a little unnecessary.
Eh. Just sounded like a little insider ballbusting to me. It's very hard to interpret sarcasm on the innerwebs.
But maybe I'm wrong, dick.
Well, you gotta make a living. You can always rehearse on your own too.
I feel your pain. I left my band last month because I work weekends and nights and couldn't get anymore time off for gigs. I tried making it work for the last year or more, but there was no way around it.
yeah, reality sucks- especially for us aging rockers. one of my bands is breaking up mostly because i can't commit to touring, even though that wasn't a requirement when we put the project together. oh well, i'd rather split up the band and keep friendships intact than continue with a situation that can only lead to resentment and blame and bum trips down the line.
Quote from: franksnbeans on May 10, 2012, 02:31:42 AM
Well, you gotta make a living. You can always rehearse on your own too.
This!
Unless you are willing to make playing music your full time job, and devote the time, sacrifice and energy that doing so requires, work comes first. Not everyone is lucky enough to have the set 9-5 M-F hours that make for consistent practice schedules. You have to take the work when it comes. If your bandmates can't accept that maybe they should pay your bills.
I've decided to use my down time getting better as a guitarist, maybe take a lesson or two and record my own stuff. That way if it sucks there's only one lazy musician to blame.
Quote from: Jake on May 09, 2012, 10:14:31 PM
Eh. Just sounded like a little insider ballbusting to me. It's very hard to interpret sarcasm on the innerwebs.
But maybe I'm wrong, dick.
It is sarcasm, and it was a long time ago. Shit, some people are just late to everything.
You're busy at work instead if being flaky and/or lackadaisical.
Huge difference. That's a sign of responsibility, and you still make whatever time you have available for music even if it ain't much. Sounds like your bandmates understand as well, and you keep them informed.
If you can't find as much time to jam as a band, make sure you play and woodshed at home. Even if it's a few minutes here and there.
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James, I know you're busy with work, dude, and that's totally understandable. It would be real nice if you'd make more of an effort to let Dan and I know ahead of time if you're going to be an hour of more late though, especially when the other member is ten times more unreliable than you are. I have other areas of my life that get neglected because of the band, and I'm okay with that. I'm not really okay with neglecting other parts of my life to wait around and wonder who's gonna show up. Wouldn't that tick you off a little?
*whistles Don Henley tune about dirty laundry*
everybody is telling you to do the right thing.
that said, my blass player quit his job to play one of our gigs once. :D
He asked for the time/night off , boss said no, he said "Well I gotta rock, so I quit."
It wasnt a good job like yours, the economy hadnt been ruined by dumbya yet, and he was younger....he never regretted it.
but yeah..what everyone else said.
Sounds like Zayus and the chaps are more upset about not getting a heads up about the tardiness than anything else.
In this era of portable communicating devices, it's nearly inexcusable.
uh huh
As suggested, you guys should just schedule your jams later.
And for fuck's sake, text or call and let somebody know something. That just seems like common sense to me.
It sucks to be waiting around for a bandmate to show and not knowing if it is even going to happen at all.
for whatever its worth we're on the same page. sometimes the problem is communication, or a lack thereof, and the solution is communication as well.
ENOUGH TALK!
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FIGHT
(http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l197/BucketsOBlood/Punch2.jpg)
LIKE
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MEN!
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it was more along these lines.... uppercuts galore
pow!!!!
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