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General Category => Jam Room => Topic started by: Hemisaurus on September 14, 2011, 10:04:52 AM

Title: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 14, 2011, 10:04:52 AM
Seeing as we're doing advice columns, this seems like a pretty important one ;D

Do tell the other band members you quit, either to their face, or in email, or text, or letter
Don't quit a band if they've got a bunch of shows lined up
Don't do the cancel each practice as it comes up with lamer and lamer excuses approach
Don't do the if I ignore them, don't answer the phone, email, door they'll go away approach

I've left a few bands, but I've always had the decency to tell them I'm leaving, and I've always waited until after we've completed any shows that were lined up. Unfortunately I have been in bands that have experienced all of the above Don'ts :(
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 12:12:46 PM
Dont just be a dick and hope they'll kick you out like I usually do.
Dont ever ever loan anyone in the band anything, no cd's, dvds,'equipment, books, NOTHING.
Dont have a band fund where all the money from your past two years of gigs sits under one persons control, unless that one person is YOU..then by all means hold their cash for that recording that will never happen and keep all the money when the band splits up...that seems to be the norm and acceptable it appears.
Dont think about them, visit their website, read their facebook postings...just wash your hands and walk away for good.
Dont take it personally even if it is personal
Do try and take a break from being in a band for a few months, think about what went wrong and how you can avoid making the same mistakes again in the future...but dont think about it TOOO much.
Dont take advice from strangers on the internet
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Harm on September 14, 2011, 02:33:09 PM
Don't leave without a clear reason.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Ayek on September 14, 2011, 02:51:53 PM
The best quit I've ever seen was when some dude announced his departure from a band on an internet forum and adding something like "I haven't told the rest of the band yet, so I guess they'll find out when they read this, too"
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 14, 2011, 02:55:56 PM
Quote from: Ayek on September 14, 2011, 02:51:53 PM
The best quit I've ever seen was when some dude announced his departure from a band on an internet forum and adding something like "I haven't told the rest of the band yet, so I guess they'll find out when they read this, too"
Hey at least they knew. One drummer in a band I was in strung us along for 3 months, 'til we gave it up.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: justinhedrick on September 14, 2011, 03:14:48 PM
wait, who's your drummer now??!  ;D
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 14, 2011, 03:38:36 PM
No, this was in a band years and years ago, we did reggae tunes, not that I still don't enjoy dub, I like fucking Gzus up with reggae basslines  ;)
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Metal and Beer on September 14, 2011, 05:20:12 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.

;D
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:41:19 PM
Quote from: Metal and Beer on September 14, 2011, 05:20:12 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.

;D
I won't, and I will, and if you do not understand, I cannot help you.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 05:47:07 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:41:19 PM
Quote from: Metal and Beer on September 14, 2011, 05:20:12 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.

;D
I won't, and I will, and if you do not understand, I cannot help you.

I am at peace with that..... and yet am not at peace with that. :-*
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:58:23 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 05:47:07 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:41:19 PM
Quote from: Metal and Beer on September 14, 2011, 05:20:12 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.

;D
I won't, and I will, and if you do not understand, I cannot help you.


I am at peace with that..... and yet am not at peace with that. :-*
Then my job is done, yet it is left undone.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 06:24:31 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:58:23 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 05:47:07 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 14, 2011, 05:41:19 PM
Quote from: Metal and Beer on September 14, 2011, 05:20:12 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 02:54:18 PM
Dont become a pontificating self important zen douchebag then have a public meltdown on an internet message board where your 12 'fans' hang out.

;D
I won't, and I will, and if you do not understand, I cannot help you.


I am at peace with that..... and yet am not at peace with that. :-*
Then my job is done, yet it is left undone.


Despite quoting you...i hvae you blocked Disco Rice. I have everyone on this message board blocked. Its just me an Paul here now. So I really cant read what you just wrote and am laughing at your foolishness for replying to me. However you may walk withme thru the sands of time if you wish, because ...yadda yadda yadda purple monkey dishwasher. I love you all.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: RacerX on September 14, 2011, 06:30:10 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Fail. dinger was meticulous about his spelling and punctuation.

Your usual chovied-stylee typing is a poor imitation.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 07:22:41 PM
Quote from: RacerX on September 14, 2011, 06:30:10 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Fail. dinger was meticulous about his spelling and punctuation.

Your usual chovied-stylee typing is a poor imitation.

i have you blocked RacerX so i cannot see what you said, however what may appear to you to be spellng and typing errors are actually my new zen sanskrit dialect. I know you can understand this becasue you are a teacher..walk with me.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: RacerX on September 14, 2011, 07:26:59 PM
Better, Grasshopper. You missed capitalizing the first "I," but perhaps that is very Zen.

Then again, perhaps not. Such is the way of things.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 07:31:06 PM
I mispelled "because" too..it was a test...to see who is the greater fool..but its juts me and paul here now laughing and playing in my creek.
el danno tried to warn you but you wouldnt hear him.
I love you anyways
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: RacerX on September 14, 2011, 07:42:58 PM
As the Brown Pyramid was built from sticks and feces (with corn added for texture), so is your love, Chovie D.

If you cannot see that, I cannot help you, but there is no way you cannot smell its pungent aroma as your fart bubbles rise in the creek waters around you.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 08:19:50 PM
Quote from: RacerX on September 14, 2011, 07:42:58 PM
As the Brown Pyramid was built from sticks and feces (with corn added for texture), so is your love, Chovie D.

If you cannot see that, I cannot help you, but there is no way you cannot smell its pungent aroma as your fart bubbles rise in the creek waters around you.


You remain blocked my friend so I cannot see what you posted , however, I do sense the armoma of which my spidey-zen senses tell me your blocked post speaks of. Perhaps it eminates from one of my many animals we have here in  this big house with many rooms by the creek in which I play..or perhaps from the difficult brown pyramid itself..i have built many such pyramids since i began my journey.
This will be my final interview. Love Superhippie
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: bitter on September 14, 2011, 10:45:32 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 14, 2011, 08:19:50 PM

..or perhaps from the difficult brown pyramid itself..

The ANALITH???
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: lordfinesse on September 15, 2011, 12:42:54 AM
Jebus I haven't laughed like that in a while. Thank you guys for that. Spot on, gentlemen.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 12:49:34 AM
As usual, I love the Jam Room.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 12:49:57 AM
Quote from: lordfinesse on September 15, 2011, 12:42:54 AM
Jebus I haven't laughed like that in a while. Thank you guys for that. Spot on, gentlemen.


No time for laughing, get on that new album, goddamn it. Where's Pissy? I need to reprimand him, too!  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 12:50:41 AM
Quote from: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 12:49:34 AM
As usual, I love the Jam Room.

Jam Room loves you back. Fuckin' christ I was worried about you, as gay as that sounds. I thought we were going to have a second missing friend situation, Shaft's shitty jokes didn't help, either.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: jibberish on September 15, 2011, 12:53:41 AM
heh.  people ARE a trip aren't they? i think anyone who is going to court needs quickie zen lessons. gl getting a straight answer out of them.

the only sad thing was that there was probably a lot more good music to that band. BTW, those two othr guys are kick ass.  i bet they resurface again quickly in another band.

....there is a song breweing from all this...still proto stardust..but it is gellin like a fel..oh no i di'nt
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 12:58:22 AM
Thanks, man. Lost an old cat, pops came down with the Alzheimer's, work has never been so busy, blah blah blah. Instead of going full Dinger, I just rode my bike a lot, smoked hella groovy joints, stayed away from the Internet, News, and folks in general, and just kinda "reflected" on shit for a while. Longer than I had intended actually, because it was rad, in all it's fucked-upness.

Anyway, I'll save it for GD, but I've lurked and enjoyed the Jam Room for 6 years or so.

It's fantastic.   Like SunnO))).
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 12:59:12 AM
(not the crappy band)
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 01:03:46 AM
Sorry aboutcher Pops, it's a brutal disease. I can't even watch people with it on television, fuckin' kills me.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 01:05:14 AM
How 'bout the Les Pauls, heh.










Thanks, bro.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 01:19:37 AM
 :( :( :( :( :( :( :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\



(http://www.vintagekramer.com/rare/DMZ_335.jpeg)
(http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e110/Recfsh/Kramer/DSC_0857.jpg)
(http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2001-12/6752/JDJMG-MarshallWall1.jpg)
(http://i38.tinypic.com/hx2pa1.jpg)


Better?
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 01:21:06 AM
Shit. Boobs!
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 01:21:37 AM
Quote from: juan11 on September 15, 2011, 01:21:06 AM
Shit. Boobs!

That's Bolt's department.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: chlorpromazine on September 15, 2011, 05:12:32 AM
Right on Juan. Glad to know that you're dealing and doing ok, now back to lurking for me too.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: RAGER on September 15, 2011, 02:36:06 PM
Good to see ya Juan.

Back on topic.  leave em in the dust.  It's just a stupid band.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Pissy on September 15, 2011, 02:49:41 PM
Quote from: SunnO))) on September 15, 2011, 12:49:57 AM
Quote from: lordfinesse on September 15, 2011, 12:42:54 AM
Jebus I haven't laughed like that in a while. Thank you guys for that. Spot on, gentlemen.


No time for laughing, get on that new album, goddamn it. Where's Pissy? I need to reprimand him, too!  ;D ;D ;D

I pulled out all my fingernails for this only to realize that my own personal pyramid was a pile of leaves full of catshit. Had to drain my wife's life savings to keep myself buried in good weed. I must begin my journey before it surely ends. And I promise you it will. I told my yogi ( prior to the restraining order) that I was trying to reach zen. She said i shouldn't be reaching for it. I love her for saying that with such depth, as she dialed the last digit for 911.
Her journey is hers alone... For it is not un-bound to science fact. I can't see you at all.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Danny G on September 15, 2011, 03:51:45 PM
DO give the band notice if you have decided to quit if they have gigs lined up. 6-8 weeks is a good amount of time for you to cover until they find a sub/replacement.

DON'T quit the band after a 3 hour practice while on the way to load in for that night's gig, with gigs the next 3 nights.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 15, 2011, 04:32:07 PM
Quote from: Pissy on September 15, 2011, 02:49:41 PM
Quote from: SunnO))) on September 15, 2011, 12:49:57 AM
Quote from: lordfinesse on September 15, 2011, 12:42:54 AM
Jebus I haven't laughed like that in a while. Thank you guys for that. Spot on, gentlemen.


No time for laughing, get on that new album, goddamn it. Where's Pissy? I need to reprimand him, too!  ;D ;D ;D

I pulled out all my fingernails for this only to realize that my own personal pyramid was a pile of leaves full of catshit. Had to drain my wife's life savings to keep myself buried in good weed. I must begin my journey before it surely ends. And I promise you it will. I told my yogi ( prior to the restraining order) that I was trying to reach zen. She said i shouldn't be reaching for it. I love her for saying that with such depth, as she dialed the last digit for 911.
Her journey is hers alone... For it is not un-bound to science fact. I can't see you at all.


My hero.

sent from Mortlock's mom's laptop...
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 15, 2011, 04:41:53 PM
Ive had two people in two differnt bands in the past couple years...wait until we are done with a two hour practice and THEN announce they are leaving the band. I would ask kindly that you do NOT do this, as youve now juts completely wasted two hours of our time and hauled us out to the jam spot for fucking nothing. send us an email the day before practice.

also...dont be afraid to quit or fire me via email. I fucking prefer it! Everyones like "you gotta be a man and tell em to their faces"...fuck that shit. tell me via email, its my prefered method of communication and i compose and review(but never for spelling) my thoughts before telling you to fuck off.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 15, 2011, 04:53:44 PM
I'd say you got to be a man, and tell them, somehow, someway, just so they know to fucking replace you, or say fuck it, we don't need a drummer/bassist/guitarist we can use a drum machine/octaver/cardboard cutout of a flaccid penis instead.

Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Metal and Beer on September 15, 2011, 05:43:01 PM
Do things the right way

Don't do things the wrong way
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Lumpy on September 15, 2011, 07:12:58 PM
Quitters never win, and winners never quit.




::)
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: justJon on September 15, 2011, 11:22:56 PM
Octavers make perfectly adequate, if not exciting, bass players.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Lumpy on September 15, 2011, 11:42:52 PM
Quote from: justJon on September 15, 2011, 11:22:56 PM
Octavers make perfectly adequate, if not exciting, bass players.

Simmer down, Ringo.

(http://vstplanet.com/Instruments_photos/Full%20view/sr-16.jpg)

Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: justJon on September 15, 2011, 11:56:51 PM
Touche'.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: RacerX on September 16, 2011, 12:11:33 AM
heh.

BURN!!
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: grimniggzy on September 16, 2011, 11:07:40 AM
Quote from: Hemisaurus on September 15, 2011, 04:53:44 PM
I'd say you got to be a man, and tell them, somehow, someway, just so they know to fucking replace you, or say fuck it, we don't need a drummer/bassist/guitarist we can use a drum machine/octaver/cardboard cutout of a flaccid penis instead.



I'd say you gotta be the man to beat the man
(http://edge.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/1945966/81499113.gif)
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 11:57:49 AM
Quote from: Lumpy on September 15, 2011, 11:42:52 PM
Quote from: justJon on September 15, 2011, 11:22:56 PM
Octavers make perfectly adequate, if not exciting, bass players.

Simmer down, Ringo.

(http://vstplanet.com/Instruments_photos/Full%20view/sr-16.jpg)


^^He uses an octave pedal on his bass to cover the guitar range, too. Lump-Dogg stands alone.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 16, 2011, 01:34:02 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 11:57:49 AM
Quote from: Lumpy on September 15, 2011, 11:42:52 PM
Quote from: justJon on September 15, 2011, 11:22:56 PM
Octavers make perfectly adequate, if not exciting, bass players.

Simmer down, Ringo.

^^He uses an octave pedal on his bass to cover the guitar range, too. Lump-Dogg stands alone.

Perhaps it's the smell?
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 01:42:12 PM
He smells like sweet cream and his ass tastes like a passionfruit smoothie.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: VOLVO))) on September 16, 2011, 01:45:28 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 01:42:12 PM
He smells like sweet cream and his ass tastes like a passionfruit smoothie.

Look at you defending your man!

HOW SWEET!

(http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSojLsF9nx91FbYwTsPmxOoGsGywWobLdq9WHMQRNxDpYS0U-taGxr5UALX)
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 16, 2011, 04:17:08 PM
 :D bout a year ago had a drummer sleep with the female lead singer...he tells his wife that he is in love with this singer...the female  singer promptly dumps him after they sleep together...the wife divorces him and moves across the state with their kid.
drummer ends up homeless, chickless, bandless, and paying child support...

no one told me what happened for a month...and i was too disiniterested to ask.

best band breakup ever


gogo drummers go!
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 04:28:23 PM
Drummers are insane - no exceptions. Don't let anybody tell you different.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 16, 2011, 04:47:38 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 04:28:23 PM
Drummers are insane - no exceptions. Don't let anybody tell you different.

it would be hard to convince me otherwsie after a lifetime of having  insane drummers.
actually singers are worse by far.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 04:51:49 PM
Drummers are insane because they get beaten down by reality. Singers have never heard of reality.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Chovie D on September 16, 2011, 05:38:57 PM
that sounds about right.

see in order to be a drummer ...you have to have parents crazy enough to buy their kid a drum set and youd have to be near insane or a masochist to do that. so right off the bat they are starting with some crazy genes.

Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 05:44:01 PM
And how. My family history is... unique.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 16, 2011, 06:04:08 PM
Quote from: grimniggzy on September 16, 2011, 11:07:40 AM
I'd say you gotta be the man to beat the man
(http://edge.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/1945966/81499113.gif)
Who is that guy, btw. I saw him in someone elses avatar (different clip, same guy) on another forum.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 06:07:14 PM
"Nature Boy" Rick Flair.
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: bitter on September 16, 2011, 06:09:30 PM
WOOO!!!
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Hemisaurus on September 16, 2011, 06:23:29 PM
Quote from: Chovie D on September 16, 2011, 05:38:57 PM
that sounds about right.

see in order to be a drummer ...you have to have parents crazy enough to buy their kid a drum set and youd have to be near insane or a masochist to do that. so right off the bat they are starting with some crazy genes.
Colour me crazy then, my kid already has his studio on the go, drums and keyboard, he's pretty good with the beatbox software on the iPad and he's got a proper keyboard with a stand and stuff in his bedroom, he likes to play the guitar and bass with me, there's a jam room attached to the house for when he's a bit older and a studio in the basement. ;)

(http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/s720x720/301014_1980661483094_1439903504_31652898_847960582_n.jpg)

Mind you I suppose I have to be kind of crazy to sing in a gasmask ;D
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: justJon on September 16, 2011, 07:19:20 PM
Quote from: Discö Rice on September 16, 2011, 04:28:23 PM
Drummers are insane - no exceptions. Don't let anybody tell you different.

My shrink says I'll never be alright, but I'm getting better!
Title: Re: Quitting Etiquette
Post by: Worthless Willie on September 17, 2011, 04:29:44 PM
I think the problem with drummers is, they have something akin to Shaken Baby Syndrome, from all that bashing and flailing around they do.